Glad to hear it.Pepsi Maxil wrote: ↑Thu Jul 02, 2020 7:19 amI'm really touched by the comments on this thread. I thank you all for your incredible support. Without you lot I would be in a far worse place than I am now. At the time of creating this thread I was in a real mess mentally and I wasn't thinking straight. In the last few days some progress has finally been made. I told my mum about my Rebecca obsession and explained that most of my suicidal thoughts are linked to her. She said she understood everything and really made me feel comfortable telling her. She agrees with people here that loving a celebrity is completely fine, but having a desire to join them is something that she desperately wants me to get help for. I didn't mention her name because I didn't feel able to, but I plan on doing so and also show some pictures of her as well. I feel like I have to do it in stages. It was finally nice to tell her as I've been interested in Rebecca since I was seventeen and I've never worked up the courage to tell her until now. She said that fantasy and reality have become mixed up in my head and I think everyone here would agree that's the case. I am not confident enough to tell a therapist about Rebecca just yet, but my mum says she will listen to anything I have to say regarding her.
I have been breaking down a lot which is why my sister has come to visit for a few days. I'm actually not allowed to be in my room for too long and I can't be left in the house on my own. I completely understand this. I'm currently on antidepressants and I felt quite ill yesterday although I'm not sure if that was more to do with stress than the tablet I took. I was informed that I would feel quite sick for a while. A few family members suggest that I limit my internet access for now. I will not leave the forum for good, but I must be careful how I spent my time at the moment. I've been going for frequent walks, watching comedy shows, talking and going for drives with my sister.
It will be a long road, but I've made the first step by revealing something so personal in real life. I even told a friend online a few days ago that I was terrified of telling my family so I do feel proud of myself that I was finally able to admit it and be so open about it. The next step is making my mum familiar with Rebecca. I feel that it would be good for her to see Rebecca in something. She definitely realizes just how much I love her and how far I'd be willing to go to prove that.
I'll update you all again in a few days. Thanks again for the support.
The anti deppresants will make a huge difference Maxil. It will maybe take a few weeks to do so, as was the case with my mental breakdown last year. (That was rough to put it mildly.)
It's nothing to be embarassed about or ashamed of. It's just an illness like any other that needs treatment and that's that and I know you will overcome it.